General Thoughts On Getting Sexual Experience
Sexual experience. That's the whole point of you visiting this site, right? This article will talk more directly about the subject, rather than giving more broad advice to help you get it.
When you're sexually inexperienced shedding that inexperience is a goal in and of itself. It's also essential to doing better with women down the road. When you've got a foundation of physical experience behind you, you'll be much more comfortable around women in general, and in going after future sex. Your whole attitude and aura becomes different. And in specific situations, you're calm and focused on what you need to do, instead of panicking like, "Oh man, I've never taken off a bra before. What if she finds out I'm a virgin?!?!!? I'll be so humiliated!"
If you're a virgin past 16 you probably know all about the infamous Catch-22 sexual experience creates: You need be comfortable with sex in order to get it, but to be comfortable with it, you need to have had it. This was a huge problem for me. I was so worried about girls finding out I was older and inexperienced that I got incredibly nervous about the idea of having to fool around with one and being found out.
Depending on where you're getting held up, the road to sexual experience could be a long or short one
There are certain things you have to be able to do to even hook up with a girl. If it will take you another six months to even get the guts to talk to someone, you're looking at at least six months before you have any chance of getting physical. If you can't hold a conversation, you've got to handle that first, and so on. Sure, you may magically fluke into getting laid tomorrow, but it's unlikely, and you're hurting your cause if you don't work on your issues and just wait around for the universe to send you a girl.
Inexperienced guys often have this mentality of, "Okay, what's the one piece of the puzzle I'm missing? I want to know what it is so I can get laid tomorrow." But there really isn't a magic key like this. It's about building up all the fundamentals I keep harping on in this site. Some inexperienced guys are actually pretty attractive and comfortable with women, but there's an area or two that's holding them back, or they just need that little extra push to get over the edge. They may be able to have sex in the near future. Other guys just have a lot of legwork to do before they can even get to the position where they're able to try sleeping with someone.
The biggest piece of advice
DO NOT TURN DOWN A CHANCE FOR SEX IF ONE COMES YOUR WAY!!!! You may think you had a good reason at the time, but in hindsight you'll eventually wish you just took the chance when you had it. If all you want to do is pop your cherry then there aren't many factors that should be valid reasons to not go through with it. It doesn't matter if the girl isn't totally gorgeous. It doesn't matter if she's sort of annoying or not your type. It doesn't matter if you may see her around later. Go for it and lose the v-card. Once you do get laid and the mystery is gone you'll look back at all the chances you had to have lost it earlier and think "Sex isn't a big deal at all, I totally should have hooked up with that chubby Kim girl when I had a chance a year ago..."
The simple, unglamorous way to get experience is to start seeing someone and stay with them long enough to do everything you want to do
To do this you do need to be able to meet a girl in the first place, which may take some work yet. Once you're seeing someone though you just have to not screw it up and stick around long enough to get some experience with kissing, foreplay, and sex. Unless you're seeing someone pretty conservative (which you shouldn't) that shouldn't be more than a month or two at most. You'll get a fair amount of sexual practice, not one off encounters.
A key to this is not to be too picky and just see anyone who seems fairly cool and like they're interested in you. The idea is just to become comfortable with sex, not meet your soul mate. I think inexperienced guys can be too picky though, to the point where it keeps them from reaching their goals earlier than they otherwise could have. I talk about this more here:
Why Sexually Inexperienced Guys Shouldn't Be Too Picky With Women
If all else fails, you can always pay for it
As a guy gets older and more desperate, this becomes the elephant in the room. If you think about it, no matter how hard up you are that instant solution is always out there. Seriously though, this is a messy issue. I talk about it more in this article:
Taking Drastic Action To Get Sexual Experience If You Can't Do It Yourself
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